Friday, December 31, 2010

FAREWELL, 2010

lWhen Arjun and I raised our glasses to a good 2010 a year ago, I didn't know how epic things would turn out to be. You see, I had come off the worst possible year - a shitty job, losing a dear friend, and breaking up in the most devastating manner, getting stabbed in the back by people I never expected to.

2010 was supposed to be a new beginning. And hoo boy, it was.
So, with all the risks of this being another of those sentimental posts that people groan at and complain about on Facebook, I proceed. So to keep things filmy, let's give out moments in awards-category style, shall we?

Turning point of the year:
The FlyYouFools contest. I entered, won a consolation prize and the audience award. Now what that did was finally spark something in myself and a friend who was the editor at PaGaLGuY and the idea of satire MBA comics came along. Seemed like a worthy experiment. But I was slightly apprehensive, given I'd never cartooned anything publish-worthy and my last strip was made back in school. But heck, why not?

What followed stunned both of us - the response to the first comic was phenomenal. Finally, I took up the mantle of the entire thing, and went pro. And that triggered off many more things - Cricinfo, MTV, In.com and hopefully a few more next year.

But it all started with that FlyYouFools contest. So thank you, Saad, even if the bucket prize never reached me.

Moment of the year
I had the balls to mail Cricinfo with an idea I had. Having had several of my 'jokes' rejected by Cricinfo commentary. Was thrilled when they wrote back and asked for samples, but positively over the moon when they liked it and offered me a piece.

It was another matter that the initial idea bombed, but I'd like to think we all learn from failures. We salvaged the section by stripping it down to a more consumable format.

Personal favourite blogpost of the year
This post. I figured that my best post would materialize when I tried LEAST to blog like myself. So I blogged like four of the most awesome bloggers in India today, and I was right. I got 1400 hits that day (never crossed 200 before) and traffic ever since has been decent.

I have a feeling, though, that this post will be my Kanitkar moment - that quality has never come since ;)

Personal favourite joke of the year
Offices moving towards the suburbs gave Nariman Point a severe Bandra-Kurla complex.
I was particularly proud of this one.

Musical moment of the year
Finally, India has a fest we can boast of. The NH7 fest was probably the best organized event ever in the country. 50 bands over 8 stages in 3 days is not a joke, but these chaps pulled it off. Not without a few SNAFUs, including sets cut mercilessly short, but things will undoubtedly get better next year.

The runner-up moment would be playing this awesome medley with a bunch of crazy people at the All-India Pagalguy Meet earlier this year. This was the 'fun' song in an otherwise kickass set, but this is the video I go back and see all the time.

Gadget of the year
Get bonus, buy DSLR. Pixie, my Nikon D5000 was my constant companion for concerts. Although I've got a lot to learn, I'd like to think I've taken a few decent pics. My favourite shots: Pentagram and the Split/Indus Creed gigs.

#epicfail of the year
Project 72. Sigh.

Favourite comic of the year
Call me a geek, but this tribute to xkcd was the most brilliant thing I've seen this year: http://www.irregularwebcomic.net/1640.html

Favourite people to meet up with
Narendra Shenoy and Anand Ramachandran. Not only are they legends and incredibly funny, but fantastic people who never refuse if you want to meet up. And they're full of stories.

Finally, thank you!
To all of you here. It never ceases to surprise me that some of you guys come back to this blog to read the tripe that I write, usually done with minimal quality control. It was in Feb that I was over the moon at crossing 30000 hits, today there are over 76000. I still can't believe that. I always wanted to make people laugh (A trait developed since I started removing my trousers in front of my LKG classmates on my first ever day at school) and I hope that I will be able to continue doing that with the blog, the cartoons, the articles and other things in 2011.

Resolutions will be made later, but #Project72 will be one of them. I will also procure off the legendary Sennheiser HD650 and have what they call 'eargasms'. Also, I shall watch more movies, under the tutelage of Prof. @dharmeshG.

I am serious. #Project72 will be a success and I will... Oooh, pizza!

Have a kickass new year, everyone.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

MY TOP 20 PINK FLOYD SONGS

All I knew of Floyd, way back in Engineering college (yes, I matured late), I remember finding a discography with a Readme that said 'Listen to Floyd, educate yourself'.

Unfortunately, as much as I've tried to delve into the deeper meanings of their songs, I've never been one to overly analyse (I do faithfully, keep the incredible SongMeanings site open at all times though) their lyrics. Needless to say, I'm a Gilmour guy in the eternal Gilmour-Waters #youprefer debate. So the following list should really come as no surprise.

I'm not a huge fan of early Floyd. Piper At The Gates of Dawn had it's moments of fun for me, but that's like a cheap circus before moving onto the main thing. The golden era of Floyd for me, as for millions of others, remain the Dark Side Of the Moon -> Wish You Were Here -> Animals -> The Wall era.

So here are the top 20, in reverse order (and YouTube videos!)

20] Atom Heart Mother Suite : After you painfully move through albums 2, 3 and 4 (yeah, I'm not a fan of that era), this track hits you. First - with its sheer length of over 23 minutes. Then, the synth riff. Then, as you read what it's about, the various 'movements'. This set the tone for another epic of similar length an album down the line, as far as listening to the discography goes. The video is linked to a 10 minute live performance in '72, by the way.

19] The Great Gig In The Sky : The first time I saw this was during a PF Tribute show in Thrissur of all places. I was blown away by a lot of songs (I was listening to Floyd - rendition or otherwise - for the first time) but this one in particular mesmerized me. Whatay vocals by Clare Torry.

18] Sorrow : As much a Gilmour fan as I am, I really don't think much of A Momentary Lapse of Reason. This track to me is the album's saving grace. I just love the way it starts, and am willing to overlook the fact that it meanders off lazily like many tracks on the album.

17] Interstellar Overdrive : Among the weirdness of the first album lies this absolute gem. It's hard to think of anyone but Syd coming up with something like this, and is surely one of the definitive guiding moments for the band.

16] Breathe : We were led to believe that the first album was a whimsy of their then leader. The next few albums, they struggled to find a voice. They found their sound with one of the most epic tracks ever from Meddle. But something was still missing. The moment you hear the chatter on Speak To Me, you know something's gonna give. Breathe kicks in. Pink Floyd, ladies and gentlemen, had arrived.

15] Hey You! : Fantastic standalone track from a brilliant concept album.

14] Welcome To The Machine : Fantastic lyrics dissing the record company establishment. Lovely atmosphere. Space-age effects that were different from Piper because they sounded mature and fit in.

13] Dogs : Their last true 'epic'. The whole Animals album showed Pink Floyd at their peak - great musicmanship, writing and production. While I like Pigs better, this was the more hard-hitting. Roger Waters at his lyrical best. I mean, sample these:


And after a while you can work on points for style,
like the club tie and the firm handshake,
a certain look in the eye and an easy smile.
You have to be trusted by the people that you lie to,
so that when thy turn their backs on you,
you'll get the chance to put the knife in.


Simple, yet killer.

12] Wish You Were Here : The title track from their 9th album has #win written all over it - from the concept of an album for Syd to the radio intro. Easily their most sing-along track, as proved by its overkill by college bands and pretty much any group with an acoustic guitar.

11] Pigs (Three Different Ones) : Waters has never sounded more vehement. For the delicious lyrical output alone, this track deserves a listen.

10] Another Brick In The Wall - Part 2 : The song everyone knows. What a tragedy, however, that they do not know how it fits in to the rest of The Wall. Featuring one of Gilmour's sweetest solos and one of rock music's most recognizable basslines.

09] Coming Back To Life : I guess here's where I lose the Waters fanboys. Sorry, chaps. Those guitar solos are just too good to ignore.


08] Have a Cigar : Again, Floyd at their peak from (what I think is) their finest album. The intro is enough to kick you in the tum, and then the fantastic vocals by guest singer, Roy Harper. Like Led Zep would later title a song, hats off.


07] Marooned : My favourite of the Floyd instrumentals. Gilmour again showing signs of genius, which just makes the world sigh wondering what would have been had Waters' ego not got the better of him.


06] Shine On You Crazy Diamond (Parts I - IV) : And each member of the band does shine here, in this tribute to their first leader, Syd Barrett. That first guitar note is probably the most 'anticipated' in the history of rock. Bliss.


05] Time : With good earphones (yay, IE7!) you can bring out the true sonic brilliance of the intro. But you don't need that to realise this is a monumental track from a band that knows it's found its purple patch. With one of the most dry takes on modern life, which still remains relevant today, Floyd were making a statement. One that would continue for the next few albums as well.


04] Money : And a couple of tracks after Time, comes this. Show me one person who hasn't been taken away by the 7/8 bassline or the 'money-sounds-loop'. Or the sax. Brilliant, brilliant track.

This brings us to the final 3.


03] High Hopes : That guitar solo. Period. (for best results, see the P.U.L.S.E version)

02] Echoes : After muddling around for 5 albums and 5 tracks, just having heard the terrible 'Seamus', a first-timer could be forgiven for giving up on Floyd. And then - the piano. THAT piano sound. Only Pink fucking Floyd could have pulled off playing the same note for over a minute. You KNOW from then that the track is going to be freaking epic, you realise this band could actually mean something. And when you hear THIS paragraph:

Cloudless everyday you fall upon my waking eyes
Inviting and inciting me to rise
And through the window in the wall
Come streaming in on sunlight wings
A million bright ambassadors of morning


there are no more doubts. But it all starts with that piano note.


01] Comfortably Numb : While there's always the temptation to move away from the 'expected' #1 in order to look 'cooler' and 'more educated', I'd still rate this as their best ever song. For a variety of reasons. The lyrics. The music. The concept. The video. The way it's sung. The arrangement. One of the greatest guitar solos of all time. The last great song by Waters/Gilmour. Again, overkilled by bands left right and center (including a couple I was involved in, who killed it rather than overkilled it) but still revered by Floydfreaks the moment that first Bm kicks in. Again, best results - P.U.L.S.E version.

Any Floyd list, however, including this one, does tremendous injustice to the masterpiece that is The Wall, where each track lays the foundation for the next. Comfortably Numb sounds freakin' better when preceded by the 2 tracks that come before it, as does ABITW-2. Even if you're going to just listen to these 20, I'd recommend giving The Wall an entire listen, and looking up the lyrics as you go.

There you go, will probably come up with Led Zep or something in a while.

Saturday, December 18, 2010

THE DIWALI CRACKER SERIES - FOR IN.COM

Following are a set of comics I'd created for In.com for their Diwali celebration. Basically 16 different types of crackers.






























Wednesday, December 01, 2010

DON'T CONDOM THIS POST, PLEASE

It's that time again where I run out of ideas so basically I fill up space by pimping others' ideas. Heck, if they can do it, so can I.

So we turn our attention, on World Aids Day, to some fun with contraceptives.

@rameshsrivats: Muthalik Condoms : Will not allow fertilization unless the sperm marries the egg first.


@abhishekmadan: Adarsh Society Condoms: This erection is illegal.

@rameshsrivats: Shahid Kapoor Condmos.

@gkhamba: Manmohan Singh condoms. So polite you won't feel a thing.


@fakingnews: Hurriyat condoms. Use it after getting stoned.

@gkhamba: Paulo Coelho condoms. Available at Alchemists.

@maxdavinci: IIPM condoms: Dare to dream beyond durex

@diogeneb: Ferozshah Kotla Condoms. Dead rubber guaranteed.


@fakingnews: Media condoms. Now covers itself.

@fakingnews: Chetan Bhagat condoms. Available in two states for one night at call center.

@rameshsrivats: Ravi Shastri Condoms : Just what the doctor ordered.

@rameshsrivats: Kareena Condoms : For er... Saif sex.

@rameshsrivats: Mamata Condoms : Guaranteed that there won't be berth.

@siddev18: A.Raja Condoms: Hits 2G spots at a time

@rameshsrivats: @diogeneb Condoms : Moc'd son

Sorry if I missed out on some epic ones, Tweetdeck lost all my pre-6 PM tweets and searching for 'condom' on Dec 01 is not the smartest thing to do.

As I end all my Twitter compilations - follow these buggers. They're freakin' funny.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

MY PORTABLE MEDIA PLAYER RECOMMENDATIONS - REVISITED

(PMP = Portable Media Player, a term I prefer over 'MP3 player'. You wouldn't call Sachin Tendulkar a 'cover driver', would you? Thought not. Moving on...)

Last year, I wrote a post with my PMP recommendations. That post apparently helped a lot of people making a decision about the player they wanted to buy. So I thought I'd give you an updated version of that list with some of the players I've seen in the market over the past year.

I am by no means a tech freak. I just happen to like gadgets and love reading reviews. And I spend a lot of money on gadgets, so people generally tend to ask me before buying stuff like players, earphones, cameras and stuff. I hope this little list helps.

So here are the recommendations, based on what I've heard of them. Also, I'm classifying them by price since that tends to be the make-or-break for most people.

Oh, before we start, something you should know. Most PMPs come bundled with pathetic earphones. Especially the iPod. Companies do this to reduce the cost of the 'bundle'. More on how you can deal with this later in the article.

Cheapest possible. Just want something to carry around!
Recommended: Transcend T.Sonic 320, 2 GB (official link)
eBay India price: INR 1600-1800

A piece of advice - even though there are things cheaper than this in the Mallu-run 'Duty Free' section of your local shopping area, please don't go for them. They're as reliable as Chris Martin's batting. You want something that'll last a while, if not provide you sonic glory.

For this requirement, I can't see anything better than the TSonic. 2GB at 1600 bucks?! That's incredible! Plus it's got an OLED display (just dual colour though) and FM. Surely, that's all that the average john on the street needs till he decides to upgrade.

Okay, something better. Would be nice if I had a screen
Recommended: Transcend MP860, 8 GB (official link)
eBay India price: INR 3300-3600

This is quite simply the best value-for-money player in the market. If it were just 8 GB at 3300, it would still be a steal. Now, when you consider that it also comes with video, an inbuilt speaker, FLAC support (woohoo), fair amount of customization, FLV support (are you kidding me?!), an eBook reader (although I think the screen is way too teeny to read a book) and the clincher - microSD card support. Yeah. That basically means you can spend 2000 more and have a 24 GB player for a total cost of 5300 bucks. And it also comes with a lovely-feeling silicone skin case.

The Philips Go-Gear has been a stellar performer in this price range too, but the sheer value-for-money factor (which is what someone in this class would be looking at) of the MP860 just beats everything else hollow.

Right, I've got some more money. Some more sound quality, please!
Recommended: Creative Zen X-Fi2 (official link)
eBay Price: INR 7000 (for the 8 GB version)

I've always been a fan of Creative products. They somehow just seem to make nice-looking products which seem fashionable and geeky both at once. Just look at their website, how can you not want something from there? I've owned a basic model long back. I've heard good things about their products since. The Zen X-Fi2 has a touch screen and the X-Fi technology which makes the audio sound a lot better. There's microSD card support - always a plus. 25 hours audio playback is decent.

Remember I told you most PMPs come bundled with useless earphones? Mid-to-high-end Creatives are a glorious exception - they come with the not-perfect-but-very-efficient EP630s. This is a very nice thought by a company I admire - so that buyers don't have to cough up cash for some decent sound.

All the way! Gimme the best!
Recommended: Cowon S9 (official link)
eBay India price: INR 13999

My love for the S9 is well-known. And not without reason. The thing is quite honestly, the best PMP I have ever seen, the price is not frightening. It's loaded with features and most importantly, to people in this class, offers stellar sound quality which is the hallmark of Cowon. Prior to the S9, I owned the little champ, the D2. The prime reason I bought that was for the sound quality and the FLAC support, which was a little rare back in 2008. I upgraded to the S9 for it's better features and appearance.

The S9 is supremely light. Some people think the build looks cheap, but I love it. I've handled it very roughly for close to a year and I don't have a single scratch on the matte backside, and the unscratchable glass (pwns the iPod Touch with this alone). It has support for every format man has created. The AMOLED screen is stunning. I've copied some of my photos to the player and browsed through it, and they look absolutely gorgeous. But the real clincher for the S9, as for most Cowon players, is the sound quality and features. The amount of customizations you can do isn't even funny. Most PMPs allow you to set equalizer settings. The S9 is the only player I've seen that allows you to adjust the equalizer bands. That's right. Prefer bass guitar to 'thump'? Just change the second equalizer band's frequency. The multiple equalizer settings allow me to optimally and easily use my speakers, headphones and earphones.

If only it had expandable memory, it would technically be perfect. Practically, a 32 GB (or even 16?) capacity should be enough to keep you entertained for a while. And a while it will entertain you, thanks to the mind-blowing 52 hours of battery for audio and 11 hours of beautiful video on the AMOLED screen. Actually add a standard USB port also. Then it would have been perfect. I hate proprietary ports.

Of course, I managed to get the Cowon S9, 32 GB for a measly INR 12000 from the US this January. So that's another lesson for you. Take advantage of uncles / friends / bosses coming from the US. Amazon has been good to me so far.

So there you go, those are my PMP recommendations. I don't have any recommendations for the high-end category. Yet.

I know it's a crime to not have mentioned Apple. I think the Touch has one of the best interfaces, atleast the best I've seen, and is my default player recommendation for someone who wants something 'sexy'. The 160 GB iPod classic is an excellent deal if you are looking for a carry-all-my-music option. That said, I am not a fan of anything other transfer method than drag-and-drop and think using iTunes is a pain for copying music.

As far as ear/headphones go, my recommendation is unless you own a Creative, dump your earphones and get yourself a good pair. Even if you need to save on your player to buy them, do it. My recommendations:

 

1. Creative EP630 : At around 700-800 bucks, it's the perfect entry-level to good audio. It's in-ear as well, so isolates noise.








2. Sennheiser HD201: This is the best starting circum-aural heaphones (meaning they go OVER the ear instead of just resting on it). So ideal for basic home gaming / movie watching. INR 1000-1200







3. Sennheiser CX300 : This is a superb pair of earphones, and amazing value for INR 1800. Actually, I'm a huge fan of Sennheiser, the entire range starting from INR 410 can't do you wrong. Pick up whatever suits your budget / style.






4. Klipsch Image S4 : The best earphones you'll find under INR 5000. They sound fantastic. I've owned this for over a year and was simply stunned by the detail they offer for the price. The only grouse - the non-standard ear-tips, which is a pain to replace. Which is part of the reason I decided to search for a new pair.






If you have an uncle coming from the US, you may want to check out the lovely Grado SR60s or 80s. Very nice sound. Held in very high esteem among audiophiles. I have tons of other good headphone recos, like the excellent Sennheiser PX100s. If you have some 70000 bucks to spare, perhaps you might consider picking these up - apparently the best headphones ever created by man. I know, cough up 30000 more and you have a Tata Nano. But would you rather own the world's cheapest car or the world's best heaphones? I know my choice.

And oh yeah - Bose is sexy and all in the store, but most audiophiles are of the opinion that it's just well-marketed. They're good sounding, no doubt, but you can do so much better for the price. The earphones worth 7000 bucks have terrible reviews. So stay away from them is my reco. Of course, the home theater systems are superb, but I'm guessing a basis Onkyo / Denon setup with beat them to the ground.

Now, coming to my gear, incase you're still interested.


1. Portable Media Player: Cowon S9. See above. INR 12000, 32 GB (from the US, though)

2. Headphones: Grado SR80. Lovely heaphones. Made for pure audio. Sweeeeeet sound. I use this for extended listening sessions. INR 5000 (again, from the US. Unavailable in India)

3. Earphones: Sennheiser IE7. I can't gloat about these enough. However, I've just got them, so I'll give you a full review later. I've owned them for just a day, and I'm already in love. I've already discovered an extra guitar in Sultans of Swing. The many layers that Warren Mendonsa so painfully and lovingly put in Ode To a Sunny Sky are all so, so prominent. I don't care that I paid what some people would consider outrageous for earphones, they are simply amazing. INR 11575 (you read that right).

4. Speakers: Altec Lansing MX5021. I consider myself very lucky to possess this pair. It's very difficult to grab one of these, and now they've stopped production, apparently (How rare are they? I can't even find an official link. Providing a review from Tech2). These are probably the best speakers before you move on to the Denons of the world. Lots of thump, superb for music and movies alike. INR 6750.

Yeah, that's a lot of money for audio. But then, I don't bike, I don't game, I don't drink too much, I don't eat out, I'm not into cars or clothes. Might as well listen to my 360 GB music collection properly.

I hope this helps you guys. Feel free to share this with your friends requiring PMP help. Look forward to part 3 sometime next year. Audio peace to all you chaps, and listen to music at safe volumes. Unlike your career or dignity, you have a shot with your ears only once, so take frikkin' good care of them.

Oh, and one favour. Please do NOT ask me : "You spend 12k on Sennheiser earphones? Why didn't you buy Bose instead?". Reasons have been mentioned in the article.

Monday, November 08, 2010

PAKISTAN LOSE AUSTRALIA-SOUTH AFRICA ODI MATCH

(Another tribute to Anand Ramachandran, whose style I'm shamelessly copying once again)

Shockwaves were sent around the cricket world as the Pakistan cricket team set another record by losing a match that didn't involve them. The 5th ODI between Australia and South Africa, played at Adelaide was heading towards a dull result, when the match referee, Aleem Dar, got onto the field and declared the match over, and Pakistan the losers.

"This is outrageous! The match was ours to lose! What nerve of these meddlesome Pakistanis to come and snatch defeat from the jaws of, er, defeat!", fumed a visibly shaken Michael Clarke, disappointed at not being able to extend Australia's losing streak to 41.

When questioned about his decision, Dar said that the match was getting way too dull and some life needed to be infused. "Also, I'm getting tired of all this every-time-there's-match-fixing-on-onus-is-on-Australia-and-India-to-revive-world-cricket nonsense. It's about time Pakistan got back its hard earned title of most controversial and unpredictable cricketing nation in the world."

Dar might not be speaking off the top of his head here. Concerted efforts have been made by the Pakistan cricket administration to regain this title. For instance, young Hamid Arafat of the U19 team conceded a six off a wide while bowling against the Holland XI. The Progressive Lahore Athletics and Hurdles Association became the first team in the history of recorded cricket to lose 24 wickets in a single innings. And in real news, of course, Pakistan conceded 48 runs off the last over to lose a match.

Reactions, as expected, have been varied.

"This is hilarious! With Pakistan cricket, who needs Faking News?" sniggered a gentleman on Twitter, known to his legions of fans as 'Gradwolf', causing owner of said website to shift uncomfortably in his chair.

"Remember the ball that Afridi bit? They used it in a cricket match and the ball broke into two before crossing the boundary. 12 runs.", remarked fraud Mallu Vivek Krishna, causing many to find merit in the rumour that Rajnikanth could be coaching the Pakistan side.

Players themselves aren't too amused.

"I wake up one morning and find that our team has lost a match we ain't even played? I mean, what's the sense being penalised for something you haven't even done?", remarked captain Misbah-ul-Haq, only waiting to be told the news that he was sacked as Pakistan captain.

South African skipper Graeme Smith was apprehensive. "I mean, it's nice and all for excitement, but it causes a bit of worry, doesn't it? I mean, just think. You'd be playing against India, but you'd be more worried about being eliminated from a NZ-Zim-Papua New Guinea tri-series. Or the Ashes. Or the 2038 World Cup. Or even the 4065 Decathalon in the Olympics."

AB de Villiers was too busy convincing people that he was not @ABVan to reply to our queries.

THE POTENTIAL AND IMMINENT FAILURE OF #PROJECT72

It's been a reasonably good year, yes. Good bunch of comic-making, gigs, a new camera, moving in with one of my best pals and all that. Yes, no doubt, when the sun goes down on 2010, and me and my friends are left with a drink in our hands and a contemplative mood in our hearts, the year will be looked back at fondly and a toast will be raised to the same.

However, nothing's quite perfect. Like a Laxman innings.

2010 also saw one of the biggest bombs as far as personal projects go. I speak of, yes, #Project72. Now incase the question on your lips is, What the hell is #Project72, I recommend you take a quick detour to this post.

Yes, the grandiose plan of getting the scale to 72kg by the end of the year looks doomed to fail. Unless one of the following happens:
1. Liposuction
2. Dismemberment of a body organ
3. I stop eating

Now, neither is the best way to go about things, and as any dietician / website-where-you-can-get-same-gyaan-as-dietician-will-give-you-for-free will tell you, trying to lose too much weight at once should never be done. Hence, with about 50 days left in this year and over 10 kg to go, it looks plain to say that #Project72 will be a monumental disaster.

But we must always look to take positives and learnings out of our failures. Otherwise where would we be, no? So just like 'We were just way too cocky, maan' was the learning for the West Indies 1983-final-making team, I had my own learning for this year:

"Eating one pack of potato chips and rationalising that it's healthier eating than 5 Big Macs, 5 bottles of Thums-Up, 10 bars of Snickers and 25 pedas is NOT good reasoning."

Yeah, we've all done it at some point, ain't we?


(Impulse-purchase-while-at-Landmark-queue time)

Oh yum! A bar of Snickers!
But I really shouldn't be eating that. It's bad for me.
Hmmm.
Oh heck, it's got nuts. Nuts have proteins and stuff so the good part will compensate for the bad parts. And I'll walk down instead of taking the escalator. There we go!

(snacking time at home)

Ooooh. Look, a pack of popcorn!
But I shouldn't be eating that. It's bad for me.
Hmm.
Oh well, atleast it's not as bad as ordering a pizza, what?

(ordering a pizza day)

Yum! Pizza!
Damn, I really shouldn't be ordering a pizza. What of my plans to control diet and stuff?
Hmmm.
Oh well, I'm ordering only a medium. It's not as bad as ordering a large, surely.

And so on.

The good news is, of course, I'm starting to have my daily bowl of Oats everyday and there are major plans of resuming cycling. Like major. Also, I have purchased a weighing machine, which mocks me everyday. So that should act as some motivation.

Also, with #Project72 being a monumental failure in 2010, it gives me one less thing to think about for 2011 - a resolution. The time thus saved could be say, used to make a comic. That comic might be noticed by some talent scout from a major comics company in the US. I might draw for them. I'll become famous. I'll have a house on the Malibu, and a nice BMW and a 98 inch LED TV. And Sennheiser HD800s also.

Ok, now I'm being a little too positive.

Time to go have another liter of my daily water quota. Ta!

Thursday, November 04, 2010

FOR SIDIN


Inspired from random Twitter conversations with @nitinbhat, @telljeeves and of course the man himself.

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

A SMALL MESSAGE


Yeah, I don't do crackers. If I want fireworks that give me lots of joy, I watch this.

Monday, October 04, 2010

SOME RANDOM POTTERY

Some random stuff happened on Twitter, which I shall shamelessly pimp here.

Harry: Printer was almost out of ink, so I had to get 50% of this done with my blood. 
Ron: Hmm, Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prints, eh?

Harry: Let's all go to Chennai and join Bikaang I say! 
Ron: Hmm, Harry Potter and the Order Of the @bigfatphoenix, eh?


Hermione: Yikes! Harry and Dumbeldore are smoking up! 
Ron: Hmm, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stoned, eh?

Hermione: Oh no! Harry just died listening to Iron Maiden's best track! 
Ron: Hmmm, Harry Potter and the Deadly Hallowed, eh?


Hermione: Oh no, Harry's been arrested, & only Mamta knows by whom! 
Ron: Hmm, Harry Potter the Prisoner of... Ask-a-Banerjee, eh? #desperate

And, lastly (thankfully)

Hermione: Harry's smoking up in the loo, and playing with clay! 
Ron: Hmm, Harry Potter the Potter with pot on the pot, eh? #NowIWillStop

I couldn't get one for Chambers. Help? 

(Talk about real-time collaboration! Just before I hit 'Publish Post', @Udupendra comes up with this gem - mildly modified of course)

Hermione: Harry's gone off to a furtive location in a suburb on the Harbour Line!
Ron: Hmm, Harry Potter and the Chembur of Secrets, eh?

Honourable mention: @SrinivasanMayur and @iPrash both thought of Chembur of Cigarettes.


Fun, fun, fun!


If you want more pottery, I suggest you take a look at this.

Thursday, September 30, 2010

THE PHENOMENON OF NEW MONTHS RESOLUTIONS

Let's face it.

Most of us are either:
a) Too drunk
b) In the presence of families

when we make our New Years Resolution. If it's the former, you're liable to say all sorts of things, including "I shall convert to Zoroastrianism by July", or "I shall achieve sales of 150% in my region" or, most ludicrously, "I shall reach 72 kg by the end of the year". If it's the latter, you'll be sober, but will still say things like "I will be a good boy" or "I shall not abuse while driving", or if you're TamBrahm, "I will get first rank in class. I will also take Carnatic classical lessons and will wear my poonal at all times and not just while visiting my grandparents."

The bottom line being, New Years' Resolutions are made in a flight of fancy, never meant to be taken seriously, and typically don't last beyond the first weekend. Especially since there's a time frame of 365 days to do it in.

Which is where the concept of New Months Resolutions steps in.

Face it, we've all been doing this at some point in our lives. "The first of the month is here! This month I shall save!" or "I shall have beer only once this month." or, still absurd, "I shall renew my year's resolution to get to 72 kg by the end of the year from this month onwards!".

It's not difficult to see why they're popular. They're easy to keep. They last for about 2 days on average, which still equates to 24 days a year, as opposed to the annual version which lasts for a week (ref: a few paragraphs up). Also, they tend to be private, as noone is liable to ask you "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT's YOUR MONTH'S RESOLUUUUTION?!!!!". See? You can make a little promise to yourself saying that you'll make sure all your Excel sheets are formatted properly this month, and won't have to worry about anyone asking you about it.

And like cricket went from Test to ODI to T20, we have a 'weekly resolution' as well.

You know - the feeling that hits you on a Sunday evening when you think, "Shit, I just wasted that week. Next week onwards, I shall pwn!". Me for instance - I've been trying to keep my personal timesheet at work diligently. But it lasts only till about noon on Mondays. Oh well.

Anyway, happy new month, people.

Sunday, September 19, 2010

WHY CHEFS SHOULDN'T BECOME DOCTORS


Idea for this was thanks to her. Lethal combination we make.

Okay, so other people thought of it first. So what? :P

Thursday, September 09, 2010

WHAT IF PINK FLOYD RELEASED THEIR ALBUMS IN THE FACEBOOK ERA?


Yeah, interesting thought, innit? Well...




And of course, their eleventh studio album would end up becoming this:

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

THE TRUTH ABOUT IIPM



 



Hmm, so no wonder then, that...