Saturday, August 29, 2009

26 IIMs TO BE SET UP BY PHASE III?

From a post of mine on PaGaLGuY.com, in reply to an article about 7 more IIMs coming up.

Right, so now we have 14 IIMs. I guess they’re just trying to exhaust the alphabet here. So…
IIMA – Ahmedabad
IIMB – Bangalore
IIMC – Calcutta (yeah, it's boring till now, innit?)
IIMD – Diu (this will be fun, with the cheap booze too)
IIME – Ernakulam (yay, one at home!)
IIMF – Faridabad
IIMG – Gobichettipalayam (I did my rural project here!)
IIMH – Haryana (IIM Rohtak actually)
IIMI – Indore
IIMJ – Jhumrithalayya
IIMK – Kozhikode
IIML – Lucknow
IIMM – Muzaffarnagar
IIMN – Nicobar (let’s not forget they’re part of India too)
IIMO – Ongole (I couldn’t find any other city starting with O!)
IIMP – Pondicherry
IIMQ – Quilon (Woohoo, Kerala's 3rd ay-yay-yem!)
IIMR – Ranchi
IIMS – Shillong (this is already operational, by the way)
IIMT – Tezpur
IIMU – Ugandamandalam
IIMV – Vasai (so that Mumbai is represented! Haw!)
IIMW – Warangal (to be built on the top floor of the NIT there)
HRD ministry to hold emergency meeting with planning session to rename three cities so that they start with X, Y, Z to fit in the other three. So possibly:
1. The region around XLRI will be renamed Xavierpur : IIMX, sounds funky no?
2. Hastinapur will be renamed Yudishtirapur for lack of any other Hindu dieties starting with Y (Lord Yama is not seen as the best person to name a city after, grant the HRD some intelligence). So here we have IIMY as well.
3. Shimla will be renamed Zimla to fit in IIMZ. Ideal, since the weather there will have most people sleeping in class anyway.
So there we go. 26 IIMs, the other 12 IIMs will probably come in Phase III.

Later edit:

Apologies. IIMT above is IIM Thiruchirapalli. Forgot that this one was already taken by the Government :P
PS: Almost makes you wonder whether Kapil Sibal is playing a similar game like this in his office.

Monday, August 24, 2009

ICICI DIVERSIFIES INTO ROCK MONUMENT BUILDING

This is interesting. I got an email today from ICICI Securities telling me that I could invest in properties.

No, you doofus, not the plain boring old land. Who wants land or apartments? That is so... 20th century! We're moving on to monuments made out of rocks. Yes, ICICI believe that a revisit to the stone age is what will drive us out of recession and into positive growth again.

If you don't believe me, check the screenshot of the email out.


If further updates are to be believed, this man has been appointed the VP of Operations of the Rock Building department:


Amazing how self-proclaimed world-class companies like ICICI do all sorts of things at senior management. And THESE are the people who we interact with - the chap who emailed me. Hehe.

What next?

Sunday, August 16, 2009

FOR SHAHID KAPOOR FANS

Dissatisfied with your version of Shahid? Well, here you go... Contact his 'creator' and order changes via this handy dandy Facebook application.


Jeepers, what next?

Thursday, August 13, 2009

FUN WITH INDIAN SURNAMES

A magnificent country like ours has tons of idiocyncracies (Indo-syncracies, did someone say?). We're a running race (pun!) that does not mind poking fun at ourselves. Otherwise how would humourists from RK Laxman to Anand Ramachandran always have new matter to come up with?

This post is about Indian surnames - and it is not meant to poke fun at any race - I love everyone from enterprising Gujjus to energetic Tams, to sharp Bongs to cunning Marathis. This is just to show you how we are a country of countries. Where a Singh has his palatial estate in Jalandhar, a Nair drives along Marine drive, and the space between them can fit in a few World-Cup winning countries.

Enough senti, enough disclaimers. Let's get right into this, now.


Gujju poet: George Bernard Shah

Mumbai chauffeur : Raju Drivemykar

Mallu skyscraper architect with an ego : IM Iyer

Punjabi Plumber: Fixthekitchen Singh

Telugu Eager Beaver : IM Reddy

Oriya F1 racer : Juan Pablo Mohantoya

Tamil dude who deals with computer momory : Didiarwan Ram

Bong outdoor advertising specialist : Saurav Bannerjee

Mallu schizophrenic guy with two personalities who couldn't be more different : Cheesen Chacko (desperate one this)

Bong dude with tendency for forming wild mobs (no surprise this) : Ganguly

Delhiite who was once a verbal messenger : Goyal

Kannadigas who can be counted on in a tough period : Kamath D Hour, Kamath D Man

Marathi bodybuilder : Kulkarnie

Delhiite who always comes before the storm : Lal

Aloof Parsi fellow : Mistry

Konkani person's autobiography : Life of Pai

UPites who devote 24 hours per week to chewing : Pandey

Generally a scared Mallu : Panicker

Untruthful Mallu : Pillai (but as you can see, he's taking medicines for it)

Gujju with sudden growth from the end of the spine : Patel

1951 novel about Karnataka's outfielders : Catcher in the Rai

UPite who's always able to laugh off his evil doings : Sinha

The tallest Gujju ever : Solanki

Circumspect Bengali due to imminent earthquake : Abhishek Tiwary

Spanish-heritage Mallu who has a gaggle : Thomas Varghese

Chennaiite who'd do anything to see that innings of 222 again! : Vishwanathan Astle (ok, really bad)


Phew, thats quite enough :-D

Friday, August 07, 2009

WHO SCREWED BANDRA?

So Bandra is the Queen of Suburbs.
And Mulund is the Prince of Suburbs.

So the question is... Who's the king?
Who screwed Bandra? Which suburb was responsible for getting her into bed?
Who's Mulund's long lost daddy?

I guess there are some questions we will never be able to answer.

Edit: After much consideration, we believe the answer is Dad-ar.