Monday, October 27, 2008

SURE SIGNS OF INTERNET ADDICTION

Who can live without the internet, right? I mean, it's pivotal to our lives, our existence and our being. From email to news to chat to YouTube, some of us would rather have a computer with an internet connection rather than food when stranded on a desert island.

Some sure-fire tell-tale signs that you think the internet is the greatest invention ever, beating even sliced bread to the ground. And all these are from my perspective.

01. You get a deep sense of sadness when you don't see a (1) next to 'inbox'.

02. You refresh all your mail accounts once in 5 minutes. For some strange reason, you prefer new email to mails to reply to!

03. You use :P while writing with a pen and paper (oh come on, you've done a :) atleast! Admit it!).

04. When people ping you asking you for help, before they can state their query, you do Ctrl-T and have the cursor in the Google bar.

05. Your chat list has a familiar 'feel' to it. You subliminally know what goes where, and if one of the regular online guys is offline, something seems terribly out of place (but you can't put a finger on it). There has to be a term for this.

06. You have a folder full of text files with answers to frequently asked questions :P

07. You love the Alexa toolbar.

08. Somehow get a kick out of watching Cricinfo commentary online, as opposed to watching a game in real life.

09. You feel the internet should never be wasted, especially an unlimited collection and keep downloading.

10. Actually cheer torrents on (Come on, you can get to 30 kbps! Go guys, go!).

11. When you say HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA or HILARIOUS!!!! what you're most likely to be doing is just smiling.

12. Refer to :P in real life as the P smiley after an incredulous friend asks why you're sticking your tongue out at a goofy angle after saying something stupid.

13. You feel extremely proud of yourself when you do something non-internet like read an actual newspaper or are writing on an actual piece of paper, so much so that you feel the dire need to go online and tell people :|

14. You have your phone attached via Bluetooth to the computer so you can send off even quicker SMSes, and can check numbers even more fundoo-ly.

15. You actually take your phone to the toilet and finish writing the blogpost, when nature calls. Like I did for this point onwards.

16. People exclaim in surprise that you actually went offline, when what really happened was you got disconnected.

17. You check your college and personal mail before brushing and going to the loo.

18. ULTRA-ADDICTION: You rename all your contacts according to how you know them (School, College, Work, Online, Others, etc) and have created mailing groups so you can spam multiple people easily.

19. You get a high when you find a long-l0st friend on Orkut, and have this feeling of relief when you finally establish contact with him. It's another matter that you may never speak to each other for months, but he just HAS to be there on your Orkut / GTalk list.

20. The last three times you saw a movie on the computer, you minimised the screen so that you could chat with someone side-by-side.

21. You find your friends in the US asking you whether it isn't time to go to bed yet, only then you realise that it's five in the morning.

22. You looked at the computer clock first for the previous point, and then, incredulous, you look at the phone.

23. The idea of signing out of GTalk is antithesis to your entire being. What if someone important pings while I'm sleeping?!

24. You waste time reading useless lists like this and say, "That will never happen to me."

PS: Slightly related post: here.

5 comments:

NRkey Menon said...

Also, we keep giving ourselves mental notes to get back to or initiate work after 10 minutes which keeps on adding up to the time, where time would be an integral multiple of 30 minutes! :)

Grondmaster said...

Redemption certified!!

I was sorely tepmted to give the odds of some of those things happening to me a la the linked post, I desisted.

Feels good to see the vestiges of the good ole' *Chuck* return...

Regards,
Grondmaster

Elda Alias The Smoking Mackerel said...

i do not need the net, i do not need a computer, i do not need an orkut profile nor do i need gtalk. all i need is a pen and a piece of paper that i can write onto and then get scanned.

The Umbrella said...

one more option...stop writing start clicking!

kaushal said...

http://desaikaushal.blogspot.com/2008/09/im-discomgoogled.html
A similar case, but quite less in intensity!!